The challenges of confronting issues of racism, prejudice and discrimination among a group of educated, liberal, justice and fairness minded white males can be greater than might be imagined. “I know I’m not prejudiced – just ask me! I accept the fact that people of color have been disadvantaged, and I both understand and support affirmative action as a means to the end of increasing opportunities for people whose options have been limited because of their race.” However, even the best intentioned and most sympathetic stance toward racism can hide or cover or completely bury unknowns about the realities, the impact, and the institutionalization of racism. In other words, many, even most, whites – especially white males - don’t know what we don’t know about racism and about our own true ignorance on this subject.

There are several reasons I am aware of (and who knows how many others I can’t yet put into words) why this is the case:

• Since we are so liberal and already on the ‘right’ side of this issue, we certainly don’t need to learn anything else. What else can I learn that I don’t already know? You would be preaching to the choir – telling me something I already know. There are plenty of other people who are so obviously racist and who ought to be confronted about their racist behavior and attitudes.
• While I am in favor of affirmative action, I am concerned that some jobs or opportunities are being given to people of color who are less qualified than their white competition. I also wonder how long we will need affirmative action before the ‘wrongs’ will have been righted. In other words, I’ll tolerate affirmative action for a while.
• “I too have had my up hill battles.” We are all so much better versed in the ways we have had to overcome obstacles than we are in the ways we are privileged or advantaged. Said another way – we don’t know anything about the obstacles that have not been barriers to us or have not limited our options. Rather, we can wax eloquently about all the road blocks, all the difficulties and all the struggles we encountered along our journey to success, or to promotion or to obtaining credentials, etc. Don’t tell me that I’m privileged – I know what I have had to overcome.
• None of us would like to admit that we feel ‘holier than thou,’ but the “I don’t think I have much to learn about racism” has the smug quality of there’s not much left to teach me. You’re focused on the wrong person. In fact, I have a few things I could teach others on this subject.
• I can prove that I’m not prejudiced. I have been disadvantaged by affirmative action or by reverse discrimination, and I didn’t complain about it! In fact, I wear it like a badge. I have earned my ‘I’m not prejudiced’ stripes.
• We might hate to admit it, but even on the occasion we might have experienced discrimination – that is, not been offered a job because it was offered to a person of color – we always had another opportunity available, and usually one of equal or greater status and value.

All of these ‘reasons’ for not looking deeper into our own awareness or our position of power or a more honest exploration of personal issues surrounding the public debates on racism are a part of what is known as White Privilege. White Privilege – the term itself conjures up lots of questions, like - What is it? and how would I know if I had it? What would the experience be like? What if it is something that is always there? How would I notice it? If I had it, what should I do about it? There are also lots of negative reactions to the term - What’s so privileged about being white today? It feels more like a burden – like I’m always the bad guy.

Once we begin to ask questions, listen with a different ear and gradually make ourselves more open to broader possibilities, our own experiences can help to raise our awareness and consciousness about race and prejudice. Two examples that inform and support my thinking and actions about race, prejudice and discrimination include seeing the Broadway play “Avenue Q,” and reading Malcolm Gladwell’s Blink! In each case, the issue is not IF one is racist; rather, the issue is first acknowledging the prejudices we all have, and then dealing with the challenge of what I can do about them. In “Avenue Q,” two characters sing: “Everyone’s a little bit racist/Sometimes./Doesn’t mean we go /Around committing hate crimes./Look around and you will find/No one’s really color blind./Maybe it’s a fact/We all should face/Everyone makes judgments/Based on race.” It is performed in the context of acknowledging racial realities. Relying more on science, Gladwell references the development and implications of the Implicit Associations Test (IAT). Demonstrations of the IAT (including an on-line demonstration) reveal that we not only don’t speak our minds, but we often don’t even know what associations we make unconsciously. Again, in each case, we are forced by realities to examine how we ask these questions.

Beginning to look at how we ask the questions is one part of the challenge. How we formulate answers is a parallel part of this process. Coming to grips with the concept of white privilege is one of a number of approaches. It is difficult to acknowledge that just by virtue of being Caucasian, one has certain advantages, privileges, and power that (and this is the most significant part of the definition!) I did not earn, that has nothing to do with my skill or competence, and that I had totally taken for granted. The most succinct description I have encountered is a quote attributed to Barry Switzer, a football coach from Oklahoma: “Some people are born on third base and go through life thinking they hit a triple.” This quote captures the essence of unearned advantage hidden in the guise of hard work. It helps to make clear how one can focus on his/her own challenge (getting from third base to home plate) while ignoring the reality that others can barely make it through the obstacles to first or second base. It’s an advantage that many (not all) whites have just by virtue of being white. One of the most remarkable things about this topic is that whites can acknowledge that people of color have had a significant disadvantage for hundreds of years; however, it never occurs to us to consider the obvious, and logically necessary opposite notion – that we therefore as whites have had a significant advantage! We seem allergic to the very idea. If we take this question seriously, can we each come up with our own answers?

Teaching AND learning about diversity is a complicated business. I’ve been told (by an African American male) that I am an ideal person to teach diversity issues because, as a middle aged white male, I have ‘no axe to grind’ or I have nothing to gain. Neither I nor my message would be dismissed - because I am white. I have also been told (by a white male) that I can’t teach diversity – I can’t know anything about discrimination because I am an older white male. Life really is a projective technique! Needless to say, this speaks volumes about the assumptions many of us make - in both directions - about people before they open their mouths or begin to write their stories (and obviously before we open our eyes or our minds!). Who among us is not at least a little on guard when we sense that someone is about to try to influence us – what we believe, what to purchase, how we should act or think, etc. Not only might the speaker have something to gain (we presume), but also it will likely be at my expense – that is, we have something to lose! How much more evidence do we need to demonstrate that the topic and the issues involved with diversity are truly personal and universal? And, that no matter how much we protest, we have a personal stake and a personal bias in the subject? No matter how much we know (in our head) about psychotherapy with people of cultures different than ourselves, how can we proceed without identifying, and acknowledging our own personal biases?

I believe that I have come through this multi-year process not just older, but I think a bit wiser. As negative and shameful as it seemed at first, identifying and acknowledging my white privilege and being more aware of my biases has freed me from protecting my image. While I cannot have the experience of a person of color, I can become an ally to people of color. I have learned to be prepared to respond to others’ racism in ways that can make a difference. I no longer collude by my silence. I realize that just because the intent is benign, it doesn’t mean that the impact can’t be devastating. I have become a better listener, and most importantly, I now have constructive conversations with people of color about racism. The programs I conduct are better too because I can normalize the process of bias and pre-judging, and hopefully I can help to increase people’s awareness of discrimination and racism.

If any of these ideas have peaked your interest, decide what doing your own work on these issues would look like, and add this direction to your own journey. It may include some of the following ideas or a program or your own design:

• Consider the possibility that we are all racist – possibly in the same way we are all gendered. That is, we are born and assigned one particular gender (“It’s a boy!”), and we cannot possibly have an equal view of what it’s like to be either gender!
• Think about times in the past and consider times in the present where you might have (or had) some unearned advantage over someone else – for any reason.
• Read! - books and articles about the experience of being a person of color (see references 2, 7, 8, 9, 10).
• Develop radar that will increase your sensitivity to offensive talk and behavior – and then object on your own behalf or check it out with those who might be offended by asking “Is _______ offensive to you?” How will anyone know if we don’t ask? Take the lead. Don’t wait for someone else.
• Save the Date – Make the time to attend an experiential program focused on self exploration of issues such as racism, prejudice and discrimination.

References:

“Whites Confronting Racism,” Training for Change, www.trainingforchange.org

“White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack” Peggy McIntosh, Independent School, Winter 1990

“Avenue Q” Robert Lopez and Jeff Marx (music and lyrics), and Jeff Whitty (book), Golden Theater, NYC

Blink!, Malcolm Gladwell, Little, Brown and Co., New York, 2005

Greenwald, A. G., McGhee, D. E., & Schwarz, J. L. K. (1998). Measuring individual differences in implicit cognition: The Implicit Association Test. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 74(6), 1464-1480

Greenwald, A. G., & Banaji, M. R. (1995). Implicit social cognition: Attitudes, self-esteem, and stereotypes. Psychological Review, 102(1), 4-27

Caver, Keith, and Livers, Ancella, “Dear White Boss,” Harvard Business Review, November 2002

Tatum, Beverly Daniel, Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria, Basic Books, New York, 1999

Robinson, Randall, The Debt: What America Owes to Blacks, Plume, New York, 2000

Kivel, Paul, Uprooting Racism: How White People Can Work for Racial Justice, New Society Publishers, British Columbia, CA, 1995